(1982, #1)
Some bands were born to be mild. Toto is one of those bands. Their members played with artists that read like a Who's Who of 70s MOR rock/pop -- Seals and Croft! Steely Dan! Boz Scaggs! Sonny and frickin' Cher! Safe and slick, Toto was best described by Rolling Stone critic David Fricke: "Every bit as bland as its name, Toto neither excites nor offends. In rock & roll, that's definitely the dreariest sin."
All sins aside, Toto was huge for about 3 years, climaxing with their 1982 album Toto IV (even their album titles bore) which launched two massive hits: "Rosanna" and "Africa." The latter, a love song to...someone...um...well, maybe the lyrics have some clues:
The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless longing for some solitary company
I know that I must do what's right
As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti
I seek to cure what's deep inside, frightened of this thing that I've become...
Forget for a moment that singer David Paich pronounces the mountain "Kilimanjairo" -- what does this all mean? Is this a guy on safari who misses his woman? What exactly is "solitary company?" And when he gets to the chorus and sings, "I bless the rains down in Africa" my brain is left in the fetal position. It's all imagery and no substance.
So, of course, it goes straight to #1. And Toto, for their troubles, win six Grammys that year. That'll make your wild dogs cry out in the night.
Fun Fact: Toto is Latin for "all encompassing."
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